Don't wait until you get her home

If you are with a young lady and she is being a complete brat, don't say something like "When I get you home, you're going over my knee!". Just put her over your knee right where you are and deal with the situation!

Then tell her she has much more of the same coming when you do get home. That will leave her on her best behaviour for the next little while.

Weird..

The "weird" thing about this picture is how everybody simply walks by without a care in the world, completely ignoring this scene right before their eyes!

The Birthday Paddle

So now someone is actually trying to make a profit from Birthday Spankings? Damn, why didn't I think of that?

But wait. If you read the fine print on the paddle, it says something like:

Surely you would never actually use this wooden paddle with a picture of a sexy young lady bending over, AND even though it has the words "Birthday Spankings!" written right on it.. "Just have your friends sign it!

Haaa HA HAAAA!!!!
Sign it??? Something tells me the makers are just trying to avoid a lawsuit in case the spanking goes overboard. We all know what people are really going to do with this paddle when they get their hands on it. Below are a few examples:

Birthday Spanking Paddle

(part 2)
If you look closely at the spanker. What does she have in her hands? That's right!

The Birthday Spanking Paddle!

Sure it has a few signatures, but they are probably from people who spanked her with it.

Birthday Spanking Paddle

Part 3
And what do we have here? The Birthday Spanking paddle making an appearance again!

Don't see any signatures on it this time. And I can't believe that guy can't be bothered to stand up to administer a swat. Lazy bastard.

I'm sure our readers could do a much better job. Maybe we should appoint several people in every major city to handle birthday spankings, so that way we know the job will be done right! Who's with me?

Birthday Spanking Paddle

(Part 4)

Oh yea... here's two more. Case closed.

Apple Spanking Wine

Give this tasty drink to a woman and she will throw herself over your knee within minutes! Just kidding. I have no idea what the deal is with this.

However after a quick search I was able to find a mixed drink called "Spanking". What a great icebreaker this could be!

Imagine the following conversation at your next party:

You: Hi, would you like a spanking?

Guest: Excuse me?

You: I said, would you like a spanking? Everyone is trying it!

Guest: What kind of party is this?

If she starts to get angry, tell her to calm down and say it's just a drink and you can't believe she hasn't heard of it.

But if she says she would like a spanking.. screw the drink, and take her to the nearest vacant bedroom and give her what she wants!
Here's the recipe for the drink